Tag Archive for: teen therapy

Should I get involved with my teenager's therapy? Parents and teen therapy

Why Should Parents Get Involved in Your Teen’s Therapy?

/in , , , , /by

We have learned that true and influential change comes from numerous helping hands. Want to know how you can help in your teen’s journey through therapy? Here’s a few tips we have for parents that want to be more involved without overstepping boundaries.

1. You are with your teen WAY MORE than the therapist is.

You live with your teenager; therefore, your influence is more frequent than any therapist! It can be helpful to have several people working towards the same goal. For example, if your teen and therapist are working on improving depressive symptoms, it can help to have parent(s) or caregivers at home to remind the teen that they are doing a good job, are not alone in their struggles, and may need to try their therapy skills.

2. You can provide a different perspective.

The therapist and teen only have their own views. Adding in what caregivers see can greatly influence what is discussed, attempted, and a part of treatment.

3. You can help your teenager with their goals.

All humans need help. What would that look like?

  • Reinforcing what is taught in therapy at home
  • Encouraging your teen to do their therapy homework.
  • Practicing a therapy goal at home can influence change outside the therapy room into the teen’s whole world.
  • Could look like a family discussing and reflecting on the therapy session.

4. Your teen needs reassurance.

From my experience, when working with teens and bringing in their parents or caregivers, the teens are often happy we did. I’ve heard things like, “I’ve never talked like that before with them.” “It felt good.” “I didn’t know my mom thought that.” “I know my parents care about me, but it feels different; good different to know they really do.”

How do I get involved?

Your therapist may suggest you join a session or two. If that doesn’t happen, try asking the therapist if it would be helpful to join for your child’s treatment.

This blog was written by Meredith Edelen, Marriage and Family Therapy Associate, LSW. Learn more about Meredith and her work by calling True Counseling at 502-777-7525.

true north therapy is now offering a teen zoom talk therapy group on july 28, 2022

New Online Teen Group Therapy Session Starting July 2022

/in , , /by

Does your teen struggle with their emotions? Are you a teen who wishes they could communicate better?

At True North Counseling, we are now offering a Teen Dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) Skills group! Join us weekly to practice coping strategies, emotion regulation, and communication skills.
This class is open to ages 13-17. Classes are online every Thursday, from 3-4 pm, beginning on July 28th. Classes are $15 per week.
If you know of a teen who would be interested/appropriate for the group, please reach out to admin@truenorththerapylouisville.com.
You can also contact us by visiting our Contact Us page or calling 502-777-7525.
How Can You Tell If a Therapist is the Right Fit? by Meredith edelen

How Can You Tell If a Therapist is the Right Fit?

/in , /by

The goal is to feel comfortable with them.

Here are some good signs the fit is present…

  • You are able to be honest with them
  • You feel safe with them
  • You trust them
  • They do not cancel sessions on you often
  • They take and ask for feedback about how sessions are going and your preferences
  • They do not tell you what to do but instead help you discover what the best choice is for you given your current situation
  • They validate your feelings or experience
  • You don’t have to re-explain things to them over and over again

Here are some signs this therapist might not be the right fit…

  • You feel uncomfortable.
  • You feel judged.
  • You don’t see the possibility of changing comfortability level.
  • Your therapist over shares about their personal life or problems (and it feels odd).
  • They call you names or use condescending language.
  • They try to be your friend or form a relationship outside of therapy office.

For some people, they might know if the therapist is a fit after the first session. For others, it might take 2-3 sessions to see comfortability or trust. Does it take you some time to connect with others? It might be the same for your therapist.

The therapeutic relationship is sacred and important. You as the client have the right to fire your therapist if the fit isn’t right. One therapist cannot be the right fit for every client out there, so don’t give up hope! You will find a therapist right for you.

This blog was written by Meredith Edelen, Marriage and Family Therapy Associate, CSW, MFTA. Learn more about Meredith here. 

Adding Self-Care to Our Social Media Habit by Zoe Avery

Adding Self-Care to Our Social Media Habit

/in , , /by

Written by student intern Zoe Avery. Zoe is currently attending University of Louisville for Couples and Family therapy and has a bachelor’s degree in English Literature from Murray State University. Learn more about her work on our staff page. 

As a child of the internet world, raised to be “tech savvy” and inundated with all of the fun (but not actually fun at all) side effects of a technology centered society, I’ve often sought out ways to be intentional about my social media usage. If not transforming all of my accounts to purely self help, providing myself with breaks from the usual and sometimes harmful aspects seen online. By taking time to intentionally curate a safe space on my social media, I’ve worked a level of self care within these various social accounts that I just can’t seem to delete.

Tips for Taking Care of Yourself While Still Using Social Media

Adding/following friends that add positivity to your feed.

For most of us it feels fairly unrealistic to delete all social media. This being said, we can still incorporate self transformation or just a mental break into our following list. Whether this is a directly therapeutic account, religious, spiritual, or just an account that posts kittens in different sized buckets, these can be helpful in grounding us during our internet usage. 

Limiting Our Own Usage.

Yes, most of us are adults, free to do as we please, but we are never too old to benefit from a little structure. By limiting our social media usage, we can be mindful of the amount of information we are absorbing from the internet and refocus our mental space on other interests. To make this more fun or easy, you can use a friend as an accountability partner, or download an app that records your time spent on various platforms so you can’t say you lost track of time! This tip rebukes the all or nothing mindset that is typically discussed around social media, and allows us to have a little bit of social media time as a treat (because we deserve it)!

Creating Our Own Safe Space.

Remember that social media can be whatever we want it to be, so make yours safe. Set firm boundaries, be authentic, and take care of yourself. Do what you need to feel safe and held within the community you create on your pages. Whether this includes having private accounts, being selective with friends/followers, not posting at all, posting everyday, use social media in a way that pours into you instead of draining you. 

My Personal Respite on Instagram

I’d like to highlight some of my favorite therapist accounts on instagram, who offer me useful and positive information daily:

@therapyforwomen

 @michaelshahan_therapy

@nedratawwab 

#Therapy TikTok: A Substitute For Actual Therapy?

/in , , , /by

By Rachel Eichberger, True North Counseling MSCFT Intern

I’ve been there- scrolling away and all of the sudden I find myself on an unexpected side of TikTok – that algorithm is getting a little too good. Eventually, after several likes and follows I realize that I found #Therapy TikTok. While there is some encouraging, validating, and even eye-opening content it makes me wonder- could people view this as a substitute for actual therapy? Since “#mentalhealth has 15.3 billion views and #therapistsoftiktok has 318 million” it is fair to assume that consumers are latching onto the de-stigmatization of mental health and potentially considering the content as guidance1. A study completed in 2022 gathered data on TikTok mental health content specific to ADHD and exposed some stirring evidence. Of “100 videos, 52% were classified as misleading and non-healthcare providers uploaded the majority of these videos”2.

While educational and inspirational content can leave consumers feeling supported, it is clear that TikTok is not an appropriate or effective substitute for therapy. A USA Today article highlighting the benefits and downside of #Therapy TikTok quoted therapist Jamie Mahler stating “TikTok can’t be therapy because therapy involves individualized care. The therapist creates the entire treatment plan around the client as an individual. It also is held to ethical standards and confidentiality in an interpersonal exchange”1.

So, should I even spend time on #Therapy TikTok? I would say, yes! The upside of this content is that users can find a welcoming environment to explore concepts and consider trying therapy. Ideally, this would provide connections to qualified providers and open doors to users who truly need the individualized care that psychotherapy provides. As with all of social media- consider the source before believing content as truth and enjoy those daily validations!

1. Dastagir, A. E. (2021, September 3). Mental health TikTok is powerful. But is it therapy?. USA TODAY. https://www.usatoday.com/story/life/health-wellness/2021/09/03/tiktok-mental-health-content-has-exploded-but-therapy/5694716001/

2. Yeung, A., Ng, E., & Abi-Jaoude, E. (2022). Tiktok and attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder: a cross-sectional study of social media content quality. Canadian Journal of Psychiatry. Revue Canadienne De Psychiatrie, 7067437221082854, 7067437221082854–7067437221082854. https://doi.org/10.1177/07067437221082854

religious trauma podcasts

Religious Trauma Podcast Haul

/in /by

Here are some podcast recommendations that deal specifically with religious trauma:

1.The Bad Christian Podcast: “asking questions and challenging evangelical Christianity and have found the same problems widespread across cultures where authenticity is low and desire to control people and their behavior is high.”

2. Can I Say This At Church Podcast: “A weekly podcast dealing with honest and open questions about faith in our God and what that means as we as a church wrestle with those questions.”

3. The Deconstructionists Podcast: “Listen, consider, explore, evolve, grow and keep moving forward… transcend AND include.”

4. Dirty Rotten Church Kids Podcast: “Millennial dads figuring out life, art, and culture on the other side of the evangelical bubble.”

5. Evangelical Podcast: “Coming to terms with a messed-up subculture, one conversation at a time.”

6. IndoctriNATION Podcast: “A weekly podcast covering cults, manipulators, and protecting yourself from systems of control.:

7. MindShift Podcast: “I am interested in helping people to reconstruct their identities after leaving religion, be it a cult, evangelical Christianity, or any group with undue influence.”

8. Poema Podcast: “Spirituality, creativity, and reclaiming the art of conversation.”

9. You Have Permission Podcast: “A resource for Christians to my right and to my left, as well as former Christians and non-religious folks; anyone who finds themselves asking difficult questions about God, science, prayer, fate, suffering, evangelism, and more.”

10. Deconversion Therapy Podcast: “The humorous podcast about religion.”

11. Exmormonology Podcast: “Because sometimes life after Mormonism needs a little study.”

12. God is Grey Podcast: “Conversations that promote intellectual, sex positive, science affirming Christianity.”

body image

Improve Your Body Image Satisfaction with Instagram… Seriously!

/in , , /by

Written by Rachel, Eichberger, our Masters of Science in Couples and Family Therapy Intern

How many times have you scrolled through social media platforms and been overtaken by a hopeless, discouraged feeling as images of thin-ideal, white bodies zoom past view? You’re not alone. These images of unattainable, altered body images seem to dominate algorithms and then contribute to viewer body dissatisfaction across genders and ages in the United States. For individuals identifying as female, “body dissatisfaction is pervasive with 91% of women indicating that they prefer an alternative body size or shape and this dissatisfaction remains relatively stable across the lifespan” (Wallis et al., 2021, p. 1). Ultimately, body dissatisfaction can lead to the “development of risk factors for eating disorders in adolescent girls, including body dissatisfaction, internalization of appearance ideals, drive for thinness, and dietary restraint (De Vries, Peter, de Graaf, & Nikken, 2016; McLean, Paxton, Wertheim, & Masters, 2015; Tiggemann & Slater, 2016). 1

So, what can be done?

It seems unrealistic to completely unplug from social media in our society. This presents an opportunity to determine if platforms like Instagram and Facebook can be used for a shift and positive change toward body image acceptance and self-love. Studies have shown that Facebook can indeed have a positive impact when harnessed correctly. For example, a study conducted with mothers in Australia demonstrated that after frequent views of non-thin ideal images and body positive content, participants may have decreased body dissatisfaction. Some of the moms set goals to “change attitudes and behaviors about body functionality, improved self-compassion, and reduction of internalization of the thin-ideal.” 2

If you find yourself seeking content that doesn’t leave you feeling ostracized, less-than, or even hopeless, consider following body-positive influencers for exposure to non-conformative content. Here are a few posted in “20 Body-Positive Instagram Accounts to Follow Right Now” by Kaitlin Pirie:

@theshirarose | Eating disorder therapist, LCSW + body positive style blogger. 🌈🦄 🏳️‍🌈 Fat positive + Health At Every Size. NYC ✈️ LA

@mynameisjessamyn | HBIC. @theunderbellyyoga @jessamynscloset. Author #everybodyyoga #yokebook. Podcast @dearjessamyn. Advocate @wegohighnc

@laura.iu | 🧁Anti-Diet Dietitian • She/Her 🌱Inclusive Nutrition Therapy • Intuitive Eating • Body Liberation ✨Learn how to feel good in the body u already have

@theantidietplan | 🛋 NYC Psychologist 📖 Author of The Diet Free Revolution 👇🏻

1. McLean, S. A., Wertheim, E. H., Masters, J., & Paxton, S. J. (2017). A pilot evaluation of a social media literacy intervention to reduce risk factors for eating disorders. International Journal of Eating Disorders, 50(7), 847–851. https://doi-org.echo.louisville.edu/10.1002/eat.22708

2. Wallis, K., Prichard, I., Hart, L., & Yager, Z. (2021). The Body Confident Mums challenge: a feasibility trial and qualitative evaluation of a body acceptance program delivered to mothers using Facebook. BMC Public Health, 21(1), 1–12. https://doi-org.echo.louisville.edu/10.1186/s12889-021-11126-8

 

purity culture

Religious Trauma & Purity Culture

/in /by

Note: This post contains specific language about sex, physical bodies, and a brief mention of sexual assault.

In purity culture, expectations for behavior are based on strict, highly stereotyped gender binaries. There are acceptable behaviors for boys and men, and different acceptable behaviors for girls and women. Purity culture is not a strictly “Christian thing,” though it did reach popularity in Evangelical Christianity in the 1990s.

Here are some of the dangerous myths of purity culture:

1. Virginity is a measure of your worth.

So many women, both friends, and clients have told me some variation of the story of their sex education. In a large assembly, a woman or girl’s virginity is compared to a flower. The flower gets passed around from person to person, getting bumped and bruised along the way. By the time the flower makes it up to the speaker, it doesn’t look nearly as pretty and fresh as when it passed through the first set of hands. The speaker then asks, “Who wants this flower?”

The implication is that if you’ve had a sexual relationship with anyone prior to marriage, you are bruised, broken, and less than. This narrative is particularly damaging to survivors of sexual abuse because their abuse is being re-perpetrated while it is emphasized that they are worthless (and worthless) because of a crime that was committed against them.

Moreover, people aren’t flowers. Or chewing gum. Or used tape. (All analogies that have been used!) Sexuality is not a finite resource. In fact (hold on to your hats!), virginity is a social construct. It’s not something that can be held in your hands, measured, or objectively seen in any way. Even the hymen isn’t a good “measure” of virginity, since nearly everyone with a vagina does not have an intact hymen (or vaginal corona) by the time they start menstruating. Otherwise, the menstrual blood wouldn’t have any place to go!

2. Sexuality is a switch that can be flipped.

In purity culture, sexual feelings and responses are rejected as unsafe, unclean, and impure—until marriage. At that point, it’s as if a switch can be flipped, and suddenly the newlywed couple can give and experience pleasure in their marital bed. In fact, often, it’s the exact opposite. If you’ve been told that your body is sinful and bad your whole life, engaging in a healthy, loving physical relationship can feel wrong. This goes for both men and women. Though women, being the recipients of more degrading messages of purity culture, often feel it more intensely. Men and women alike have reported panic attacks after engaging in sex with their spouses for the first time. Some have physical reactions, including hives, vomiting, and even migraines. It’s almost impossible to set aside the myths of purity culture just because of two magic words (“I do.”).

3. Girls and women are responsible for boys’ and men’s sexual behavior.

Much of purity culture puts the responsibility of “purity” on girls and women. They’re told to cover up (from the least extreme examples of covered shoulders, collar bones, and skirts or shorts that are, at minimum, fingertip length; to the most extreme examples of long sleeves and long skirts, even in sweltering weather in which boys and men are allowed to be shirtless and wearing shorts of any length) and remonstrated to “never to put a stumbling block or hindrance in the way of a brother” (Romans 14:13-23). (NOTE: I’m no Biblical scholar, but the rest of that passage talks about how everything is clean in the eyes of God and includes the line, “Whoever thus serves Christ is acceptable to God and approved by men.” Seems to me that there’s a bit of selective listening going on when people quote the first line only.)

The extreme example of girls and women being responsible for boys’ and men’s sexual behavior can be found in the victim-blaming that surrounds women who report sexual assaults by prominent evangelicals, from Jessica Hahn to Ashley Johnson. In purity culture, girls and women are not taught about agency or consent—their bodies are for others’ consumption, not worthy in their own right.

What things were you told about purity culture? How have you seen purity culture play out in your life, or in the lives of others?

racial profiling

Racial Profiling and Our Youth

/in , /by

Time to Wake Up! Protecting our Black Youth from Racial Profiling

“Racial profiling is a longstanding and deeply troubling national problem despite claims that the United States has entered a “post-racial era.” It occurs every day, in cities and towns across the country, when law enforcement and private security target people of color for humiliating and often frightening detentions, interrogations, and searches without evidence of criminal activity and based on perceived race, ethnicity, national origin, or religion. Racial profiling is patently illegal, violating the U.S. Constitution’s core promises of equal protection under the law to all and freedom from unreasonable searches and seizures.” –ACLU

I grieve for George Floyd and Breonna Taylor. Few of us can imagine the horror that they experienced in those last moments as they were murdered by the people who took an oath to serve and protect them. I grieve and I am disgusted. I want to do something!

As a Social Worker and owner of an agency that focuses on serving and protecting our black youth, I believe that I have been sleepwalking. Most of us have. I hear stories and read accounts of young black men being stopped and handcuffed for bogus traffic stops simply because they were black. Our young black men in our community do not feel safe! They live in constant fear of being stopped by the police. Imagine, if you can, how oppressive that is. It is emotional abuse! The young black men that I work with suffer from this oppressive fear. They feel it every day as that they walk into or drive into the community.

The fear of racial profiling is traumatizing our black youth, and we must wake up and reignite the passion that will end it once and forever.

Here’s an important name: Tae-Ahn Lea. Tae-Ahn was the teenager that was stopped in June of 2019 (a year ago) and detained in handcuffs while his car was searched for 1 ½ hours for drugs. He is suing the Police Department. Here is part of that document:

“Tae-Ahn Lea is an honors graduate from Central High School. He was the homecoming king, has no criminal history and upon graduation became employed with a well-respected local car dealership. Tae-Ahn, however, also happens to be black, live in a low-income neighborhood, and drive his mother’s fairly new vehicle. He was thus the perfect target for members of the Ninth Mobile Division of the Louisville Metro Police Department who, throughout the past two years in Louisville, have employed a discriminatory, prejudicial, and illegal stop and frisk practice in which “violent crimes” units use traffic stops as a pretext for pulling over young black men driving nice cars, handcuffing them and subjecting them to abusive, racist, and intrusive searches without consent, good cause, or reasonable suspicion of any criminal activity.”

Time to wake up! Time to do something! Young black men in our community need our help! They need my help. As an agency, we will be investing time, work, and money to stop this illegal practice! We cannot do everything, but we can do something! It’s time to be a change agent! It’s time to end racial profiling!

Join us!

burnout

Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking The Stress Cycle

/in , , , /by

Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle

by Emily Nagoski and Amelia Nagoski

“The problem is not that we aren’t trying. The problem isn’t even that we don’t know how. The problem is the world has turned “wellness” into yet another goal everyone “should” strive for, but only people with time and money and nannies and yachts and Oprah’s phone number can actually achieve.”

Sometimes a book comes along at the exact right time in your life. Sometimes, that’s a book you probably should have read three degrees ago. This book is exactly that for me. It provided a brand-new way of looking at stress in my life by separating stress from stressors. They write:

“Dealing with your stress is a separate process from dealing with the things that cause your stress. To deal with your stress, you have to complete the cycle…Stressors are what activate the stress response in your body. They can be anything you see, hear, smell, touch, taste, or imagine could do you harm. There are external stressors: work, money, family, time, cultural norms and expectations, experiences of discrimination, and so on. And there are less tangible, internal stressors: self-criticism, body image, identity, memories, and The Future. In different ways and to different degrees, all of these things may be interpreted by your body as potential threats.”

A failure to go through and resolve the stress cycle can result in burnout, which was “first coined as a technical term by Herbert Freudenberger in 1975. ‘Burnout’ was defined by three components: 1. emotional exhaustion—the fatigue that comes from caring too much, for too long; 2. depersonalization—the depletion of empathy, caring, and compassion; and 3. decreased sense of accomplishment—an unconquerable sense of futility: feeling that nothing you do makes any difference.”

If we’ve known about burnout for so long, how is it that we’re just now figuring out how to fix it?

This is not quite a rhetorical question. The answer is: Because it’s hard. If everyone knew how to combat burnout, we would all be doing it! (And the monetized “experience of self-care” that’s sold by the capitalist machine will go away, but that’s for another time…) Part of the problem is that we’ve been looking at stress the wrong way. “The good news is that stress is not the problem. The problem is that the strategies that deal with stressors have almost no relationship to the strategies that deal with the physiological reactions our bodies have to those stressors. To be “well” is not to live in a state of perpetual safety and calm, but to move fluidly from a state of adversity, risk, adventure, or excitement, back to safety and calm, and out again. Stress is not bad for you; being stuck is bad for you.”

To get un-stuck, the Nagoskis’ write, we must move. Run, dance, kickbox, tense and release muscles, and, most importantly, breathe. The book has other great tips, as well as a way to plan out all of the options you have for completing the stress cycle.

So the real question is: How are you completing the stress cycle today?